


homestuck texts

by wonderminterplus



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drabble Collection, Homestuck Kink Meme, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-27
Updated: 2012-03-27
Packaged: 2017-11-02 14:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/370219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonderminterplus/pseuds/wonderminterplus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a collection of fills I've done for the homestuck kink meme based off the theme of having a text from the "texts from last night" site and given homestuck characters or pairings to use in them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Reparations

(407):  
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.

 

It took John Egbert a few moments to wake up. Then a few moments longer to remember what he and Karkat had done last night. Not that having sex with Karkat was regrettable. They had done it more than once by this time. It was more that John knew Karkat was likely to be in a even pisser mood than normal.

Somehow in the heat of things last night John for the first time ever ended up on top. And though Karkat had moaned and cried out in pleasure, letting out the occasional swear that he was apt to do, he still seemed a little miffed that he was the bottom this time.

Well, just laying bed and delaying the inevitable would do no good. Thankfully he didn’t have to face Karkat as he got dressed. Karkat had gotten up earlier than him, which was unusual within itself. Just what was he up to? Sighing deeply as he finished dressing he went downstairs to find out.

To his surprise when he found Karkat there was no angry screaming involved. Instead he was sitting at the kitchen table and eating cereal. Cinnamon Toast Crunch by the looks of it. The silence as John went to retrieve a bowl and spoon was unnerving. 

“Umm... so.. how is-” John started, trying to break the silence.

“My ass? Oh, peachy. The throbbing pain will probably last for weeks.” Karkat replied though he seemed fairly calm.

That worried John.

“I’m sorry Karkat. But you didn’t hear me complain when-”

“You spent weeks on the couch, wrapped in blankets and watching Nicolas Cage movies.”

John had nothing to say to that. He just took the book of cereal and poured. Nothing came out.

“Oh, by the way. I ate all your cinnamon toast crunch. Consider it reparation payment for the anal insertion.”

John tried shaking the box to see if maybe there were some left over pieces.

“And I may keep collecting payment until my ass stops hurting.”

“This was a unopened box!” John shouted.

“Making sure I got every bit of my reparation payment.” Karkat said.

“My Cinnamon Toast Crunch...” John whined.

“My reparation payment.” Karkat corrected.

“Would you stop calling it that!”

Karkat shrugged. John frowned but pushed back from the table.

“I’ll just buy more cereal.” John sighed.

“You do that.”

John started out the kitchen door before pausing and looking back to Karkat.

“So... need something for your ass?”

John ducked the bowl Karkat threw and laughed before fleeing.


	2. The perils of a drunk shipper

"(425): What goes on in that head of yours?

(206): Gay sex, for the most part. Why?"

 

Equius had done all in his power to keep Nepeta away from the alcohol. But his attempts had been in vain it seemed as after he came back from the bathroom Nepeta was clearly drunk. And he had only been in the bathroom ten minutes. He would have been out of there sooner if he didn’t have to fix the bathroom door after accidentally pulling it off it’s hinges.

“Nepeta! Didn’t I tell you not to touch the alcohol.” Equius said with a sigh.

“I tried. But Gamzee offered me a glass.. said it was filled with miracles. And it was!” Nepeta said, giggling at the end of her sentence.

Equius just sighed again. He couldn’t quite get mad at the highblood. Besides, he doubted Gamzee was being malicious in the act of giving Nepeta alcohol.

“Very well then. But perhaps we should get you back to your hive before you-” Equius paused, noticing Nepeta was writing something furiously on a napkin. “May I ask what you’re writing?”

“Just some notes of what's going through my mind right now.” Nepeta said, slightly slurred.

“What exactly is going through your mind right now?”

“Gay sex mostly. Why?”

That had caught Equius completely off guard.

“... What?”

“I mean, look at Sollux and Eridan.”

Equius did. Sollux was casually tossing small pretzels at the back of Eridan’s head. Eridan was not so casually clenching his fists and refusing to turn his head to give Sollux the satisfaction of getting his attention.

“There there doesn’t seem to be a difference between the two.”

“Oh please. They so want to go at it.” Nepeta said, chugging down the rest of her drink before Equius could stop her. She then shouted “Get a room you two!” to Eridan and Sollux.

That got Eridan’s attention.

“Excuse me? How dare you suggest- Sol, did you put her up to this?”

“Oh don’t fucking flatter yourself. As if I’d do that.”

As the argument unfolded Equius realised he should really get Nepeta out of here.

“Come Nepeta. I think some rest will do you good.”

“Fine.” Nepeta mumbled, standing up from the stool. Thankfully she was able to stand and make her way to the door.However as they passed Eridan and Sollux Nepeta paused. She then pushed Sollux against Eridan making their lips touch in the act.

“Now kiss!” she shouted.

In the following chaos of most of the others trolls breaking into laughter and Sollux jumping back and half complaining half explaining to a shell shocked Eridan, Nepeta made her exit.

“Shipper out. Peace!”

Equius quickly followed to make sure she would get to her hive safely. Goodness knows she would have a bad enough time the next day explaining her actions this night.


End file.
